Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
Let’s face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don’t fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn’t the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn’t the preacher praught.
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn’t a race at all)
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.
Tag Archives: fun
A puzzle to rack your brains
Can you solve this puzzle?
My name’s Frank. Who is my mother’s younger sister’s father’s bother-in-law’s wife’s father’s only great grandson? My uncle is called John and his father is called Jim. Jim has got two brothers Jack and Jeremy
Funny newspaper classifieds
No comment!!!!!!
Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndro…
….bwllllantysiliogogogoch
I was 14 ,and staying in England, the first time I heard this word. We were a group of teenagers attending classes from 9.00 to 13.00 and we really needed some funny breaks in-between the sometimes tedious lessons.
So I remember the teacher challenged us to try to give her the longest word we could think of, and I offered the popular ” supercalifragilisticoespialidoso”. Well, I was pretty sure nobody could beat me there but then she said she had an even longer one.
Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch .
Phew!!!
She was at pains to write it and… to pronounce it.
But what is this long name? What does it stand for?
It is the name of a village on the island of Anglesey in North Wales ; in fact, it’s one of the most-photographed places in North Wales and it has been officially recognised as one of the longest words in the world, but it cannot be considered an authentic Welsh toponym as it was made up in the 1860s to give the railway station the longest name of any railway station in the UK to mainly attract visitors . And this early publicity stunt has worked as thousands of visitors visit this place every year.
By the way, this toponym has a meaning: “The church of St. Mary in the hollow of white hazel trees near the rapid whirlpool by St. Tysilio’s of the red cave”.
Want to have a go at pronouncing it?llanfair.mp3
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Now, there is some homework , what do you call the people living in this tiny picturesque village?
Natasha Bedingfield
Natasha Anne Bedingfield (born November 26, 1981) is an English singer and songwriter who debuted in the 1980s as a member of the Christian dance/electronic group The DNA Algorithm with her siblings Daniel Bedingfield and Nikola 
Rachelle. Throughout the 1990s and early 2000s, Bedingfield recorded rock and gospel songs for the Hillsong London Church. She recorded her first album Unwritten in 2004. The album contained primarily uptempo pop songs and was influenced by R&B music,it enjoyed international success with over 2.5 million sold worldwide. In 2007, she received a Grammy Award nomination for “Best Female Pop Vocal Performance” for “Unwritten”. Bedingfield’s second album N.B (2007) was yielded by “I Wanna Have Your Babies” and “Soulmate”. Bedingfield has achieved 5 top ten singles in the United Kingdom to date. Bedingfield has promoted humanitarian causes throughout the world, and is noted for her work with children in the “Stop the Traffik” campaign through her mother’s charity, Global Angels.